It’s a nice rainy day at the homestead. I’ve always loved the rain. It reminds me, though, of a dream I had last night where I was walking down a sidewalk and the skies were blue, the air was dry and there was nothing trying to bite me – ahhh it was heaven. The house was in the dream again. It was a 3 story house, or maybe 4, but in the dream it was thought of as 3 story. It had a ground level then an upstairs, then a 3rd floor above that that we didn’t even use because it was too high up and the stairs were to dangerous to navigate so it was empty, empty white rafters.
Below the ground level was a dark and murky basement and there was a door that led to an old underground network of tunnels. In some places it opened into big spaces which were old libraries or storage areas for old things, like war memorabilia. It looked like no one was there or had been there for many years, but it seemed like people did live down there at some time.
There were doors that led up into other peoples houses and businesses above and on the wall on the tunnel side next to the doors were plaques. They didn’t have words on them but were representative pictures. Some were fairly modern while some were truly ancient made out of precious metals and enamels like blue faience.
In the dream I wanted to sell the house but thought I would really miss the doorway to the tunnel, it had become my territory in a way.
You know, it just occurs to me that I was thinking last night how this project, this tarot project had become a burden. Not a bad burden but one all the same because I have picked up so much baggage along the way that I have to now drag it along. At this point I can’t turn back but have to finish what I set out to do.
Maybe the house is this place in my life and the tarot is my doorway to the subconscious, the underground tunnels with their books and memorabilia. And I really don’t want to give that up. I didn’t think I did….maybe I am worried that when I am done I will have to, it won’t be a choice.
I’m hoping I get some time to work on some sketches tonight, it’s so much fun. I’ve been mostly trying to solidify what the 8s mean; reading, going over old notes, exploring different ideas, making lists and charts.
I’ve really had a big shift in my understanding of the elements lately and I am just trying to settle everything out.