(jump to about 2:05 if you want to skip to the action)
I’m over here in the office working on the 9 of Wands again. I just had a very strange idea!
I am drawing this giant tiger and it was supposed to be ridden by a woman, but upon further reflection there is no good reason why it has to be a woman (it probably came to mind just because I associate with tigers so strongly), well, I had come across a picture of Crowley recently that I didn’t recognize, or maybe I’ve seen it before but it looks different somehow. And it looks like someone colored it and the colors match, though far softer, the colors I have planned for this. All of a sudden I could just see him riding this whipping giant tiger body!
I keep hearing the phrase “The biggest wand of them all”. <deleting joke that was in too much bad taste to leave in, and NO it isn’t what your thinking!>
As far as *Wands* being the tool of a magician, a transformative tool, I would say Crowley is the biggest magician I know of. I am sure there are others, perhaps many others, who are more quiet and subtle, but this card isn’t shaping up to be quiet and subtle, rather, it is screaming out loud who you are as a powerful individual with pride! No matter how *flawed* you might be, or how un-politically correct your aspects might be, no matter how dark or light, soft or hard, you are what you are and will only reach your full potential if you fully accept it.
I have been thinking of him quite a bit since I started thinking about this card because I think it resembles Mystery, Babylon (ahh thats probably why I saw it as female, but perhaps she is the beast).
I’m no scholar of Crowley, and haven’t ever been especially interested in his personal life, but just from what I have read and absorbed through osmosis of living and breathing tarot for a decade, I get the impression that he was always searching for Babylon. And I wonder if he never recognised it in himself. I have heard about all the women he …treated badly, children he had and lost, what intense relationships he must have had. But never can you find this in someone else,I think.
To me, the alchemy is all in your self. Then it reverberates out from there. The absolute most profound union you will make is inside and you will transform yourself.
I sometimes wonder if he was gay and in denial of it in whole or part.
I have begun to wonder, too, if humans aren’t capable of just as dramatic a transformation as, say, caterpillars or amphibians, just that it is not as apparent on the outside.
Back to work!